There are celebrities that can pull it off and be completely beautiful. I am not in that category. It takes a certain amount of confidence and self esteem to pull it off and I never could.
At 260 lbs, I never felt beautiful. My husband would tell me that I am but when you look like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man, pulling off beautiful is hard to do. This photo, in the white dress... I hated myself that day. I took one look in the mirror, I never told my husband that I hated how I looked t.he day we were married. I never told my husband how it upset me that there was no way he could carry me over the threshold. I did not feel like a young blushing bride. I felt like a cow.
|Me at 21, 175 lbs.|
I think my husband liked me at this weight because he did not have to worry if men were hitting on me. Clearly, men were not. I think he has confidence issues of his own.
|Me at 18|
When I was young, I worked really hard to fit that image. At some time I gave up on me and I gave up fighting for the dietary choices that I knew were best for my family. It is so hard to have to always fight your family for the choices that you know are the right ones for your family.
Don't even get me started on how I feel about the food choices my husband puts in his face. We could completely change his "hereditary" high blood pressure around. He would never have that though unless he were dying of cancer right now.
It doesn't matter that his heart is fighting to pump blood and oxygen in his body. He will stay on this pill so he can eat what he wants, when he wants. I love him and to be honest, that mindset scares the crap out of me because the end isn't an old age death.
Anyhow, as I was saying before my rant, being overweight never felt good. I never felt pretty or healthy. The smaller I get, the more I feel like me. I never felt like me when I was really heavy.
The self esteem issue is exactly why fat shaming is stupid. Overweight people fat shame themselves without you. Obesity has a psychological effect that is a lot like anorexia or bulimia in the opposite direction. It is all done due to self esteem. You wouldn't anorexia shame an anorexic would you? I mean you could make the condition worse.
|Me currently 190 lbs|
Obesity is like that. You fat shame which causes depression, eat. Happy, eat. Sad, eat. With friend, eat. Obesity is an emotional issue. Try instead to say "Do you want to go for a walk with me?" and don't give up when they say no. Ask every day. But do not tell anyone how fat they are.